In the early 1900s, Jesse, a young American lady convinces Allan, an experienced fortune hunter, to accompany her on an expedition to locate her lost dad who has previously traveled to Africa multiple times, but this one time hasn’t returned. It’s thought that he might be in trouble. He indeed is. Professor Hudson is quite literally a treasure map on legs and has been kidnapped by a German military explorer who, like him, is on a quest to establish the precise whereabouts of King Solomon’s mines. His ransom is to take the German to the site. Along the way, Jesse, her compatriot and the German clash severally in failed rescue attempts of Prof. Hudson. However, nothing could possibly prepare them for the horror that’s coming up.

This cat and mouse chase in the grasslands leads Jesse and Allan to stumble upon the Breasts of Sheba—cone-shaped geological protrusions which are in fact the site of the mines. Trouble is, this place is inhabited by a primitive and hostile tribe—the Kukuana. The unwelcome visitors are soon surrounded and captured by the indigenous people. In a short while, this pair will learn that they’ve been enlisted onto the day’s menu for dinner.

The Kukuana are cannibals and their taste buds seem to have a knack for white meat! After all, even your nutritionist agrees that white meat is healthy for you! Following a brief inspection of what the gods had graciously delivered into their hands, the tribal chief gives the go-ahead for dinner preparations to commence. The locals instantly erupt into dance and party, and immediately set alight the massive stove that sits in the center of the compound. Right on the stove is a gigantic pot filled with water, onions, peppers, garlic and all manner of spices, ready to cook. Jesse and Allan are then thrust into the pot! Looks like it’s gonna be the good old boiled stew tonight! How the rest of that unfolded is a whole other matter.

If you grew up in the 80’s or early 90’s, you’re certainly familiar with the adventure that King Solomon’s mines was. In my heyday, we didn’t watch—we binged on this blockbuster like our lives depended on it! There was every excuse to slide that VHS tape into the player every now and again; and we didn’t care if it was the one-thousandth time we were doing that.

A couple of weeks ago, I discovered a bizarre story on the cyber streets that revived the memory of this movie. The content of the story is quite repugnant, but you’ve come too far to stop here. So, just brave it and read on!

The apparent cost of living crisis in Europe, especially the United Kingdom, has led to the establishment of facilities that not only avail cheaper alternative nutritious food sources, but also provide a source of income to vulnerable individuals to ease the yoke of economic hardship.

Somewhere in the market town of Boston, England, is a factory that manufactures meat. That’s not news at all, until you discover that this isn’t your regular beef, but, rather, human meat! The company, Good Harvest, prides in being the first in the world to engineer this kind of protein for eating. The meat is lab grown using strips of bodily tissue from human donors. They’re sampled from selected parts of your body: thigh, buttocks, underarm et al. In a matter of hours after the culturing process begins, the strips develop into solid, full-size chunks of steak that are packaged and ready for sale at your favorite supermarket.

On the other end of the spectrum, the donor receives their remuneration, which’s supposedly commensurate with the body part from which the slice of flesh was extracted. As such, each part is priced differently! The pay is a few hundred pounds: peanuts, obviously, but I suppose that’s the cost of desperation. Evidently, this is not as worthwhile or lucrative for the donor as the age-old organ donation range where, say, a kidney could fetch in the region of $100k. That notwithstanding, in its less-than nine months’ existence, this newly-established facility produces in excess of six tons of human meat each day. In body weight, that should be the equivalent of about 60 average-size persons. Undoubtedly, the horror of this nature of biotech engineering raises lots of ethical questions. Why human meat and not animal meat? Wonderful question whose answer is more lame than a duck! But we’ll not get into that.

Anyway, if you were clever enough to dash to your browser five minutes ago and punch Good Harvest into your search bar, you would’ve noticed by now that there’s no such meat engineering plant in existence. But don’t beat yourself if you didn’t go searching! If you’ve read this far, you’re still clever, cos even though what you just read is fictitious, there’s much to learn from it. Whereas the content of the story—distasteful as it was—may not be true, it did actually run in the UK as a satirical TV documentary. The intention was to draw attention to the skyrocketing cost of living in that part of the world, that could push people against the wall and potentially cause them to consider engaging in the most vile of things! As to whether the creators of the documentary succeeded is subjective. However, the whole thing did also highlight a sinister motive that might—just might—secretly be on the prowl.

Crowd psychology and predictive programming, as weapons of mind control, leverage on what we know as fictitious stories such as the one you’ve just read in order to tactfully introduce and advance eccentric agendas. Generally, the film industry, especially Hollywood, excels at this! Something that was once as abhorrent as merely talking about eating human flesh can gradually become more acceptable in a modern, civilized society, and eventually roll out without much fuss, cos the concept was introduced to your mind over a period of time.

For centuries, the human diet has constituted meat and animal products as a primary source of protein. Our taste buds have explored pretty much all meat known to mankind. Special thanks to the Chinese for trailblazing in this regard!

The survivors of a 1972 Uruguay plane crash in the Andes mountains resorted to cannibalism as a way of survival after they were left stranded for 72 days.

Human cannibalism in itself has existed since ancient times, but has predominantly been a spiritual ritual or done in desperate times of famine rather than as a socially acceptable lifestyle. So, technically, human meat has been lurking in the shadows until now when the idea of normalizing its consumption is subtly crawling to the forefront.

That said, about 18% represents the amount of calories humans derive from consuming livestock, yet 77% of global farmland is taken up in the cultivation of animal feed to meet that need. With world population growth on an upward trajectory, not only does this underscore inefficiency issues in terms of organic meat production vis-a-vis environmental impact of the same, but the vegans don’t particularly like it that we carnivores are apparently exerting pressure on nature, all for a few pieces of steak! They reckon we’re making a huge mis-steak!

Cultured meat is now available for consumption in some developed countries.

With Climate Change top on his agenda, in September 2022 President Biden signed an Executive Order advancing biotechnology and bio-manufacturing so as to augment the cultivation of substitute non-agricultural food sources—lab-engineered food! Whether or not you believe in the whole climate change phenomenon, livestock emissions in terms of methane—from manure and gastroenteric releases—are reportedly tens of times more potent than CO2 and contribute 32% towards global warming. It doesn’t help that the demand for animal protein is high and unrelenting! It’s for this reason that companies in America and Asia have jumped on the bandwagon to embark on commercializing lab meat production.

In retrospect, if that isn’t the perfect platform for human meat to furtively sneak into the lab for industrial-scale cultivation and consumption, I don’t know what is. In a little while, the person you’re meeting for the first time might be the one you had at that sumptuous dinner the previous evening. How’s that for ‘It was nice eating you!’? Anywho, for now, let’s consider this a conspiracy theory!


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