I’m a writer, storyteller, and the Author/Editor of Tales By Em. You're about to be impacted with great thoughts and vibes through my writing on culture, travel, mysteries; as well as my personal opinions that are occasionally infused in satire. The perspectives that you'll come across here are my insights into what life is like in Uganda and beyond!
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The low-budget edition comes with an iconic smokey, rusty taste that is derived from the often sooty pan on which it’s prepared. The smoke rising from the charcoal stove delicately sips into the omelette and is a fundamentally vital ingredient that can’t be taken for granted, cos you’ll never find that distinctive flavor in the neatly-made rolexes.
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Cannibalism in itself has existed since ancient times, but has predominantly been practiced as a spiritual ritual or in the desperate times of famine rather than as a socially acceptable lifestyle. So, technically, human meat has been lurking in the shadows until now when the idea of normalizing its consumption is subtly crawling to the forefront.
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Postcolonial Africa has largely been the playground for the western world in the aspect of scrambling for, partitioning and exploitation of the continent’s vast natural resources at the expense of its citizens. With the emphatic arrival of the West’s nemeses, Russia and China, at the poker table, the landscape may have been altered for the better.
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My disposition towards the ladies effectively landed me in hot soup with some fellas for reasons best known to them. Possibly for jeopardizing their prospects! In those days, most students seemed far more familiar with the nuances of romantic relationships than my naive mind was. However, I now totally understand why I became the subject of numerous episodes of bullying in school.
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“There’s no way by any stretch of the imagination that this child could be mine!” he’s thinking. Joseph is terribly disappointed. Up until this point, he had all the confidence in the world that no other man but he had bagged 100% rights to bringing Mary’s virginity story to a climactic conclusion. Suddenly, all that is no more!
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I have great confidence that, henceforth, there will be more billionaires joining Elon Musk in exploring the vastness of outer space than there will be that dare to even board their own super yachts, lest the ghosts of the Titanic invite them to dinner without warning!
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Finally, after many have left, this place gradually returns to its usual serene self; perhaps accommodating the occasional stranded pilgrims who conveniently don’t seem to remember the way that led them to the site. Or they simply gave up their return fare the previous night in exchange for some pieces of juicy chicken thigh at Rasta’s grill.
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Listening to all this, I’m seated there absolutely startled and terrified at this surreal story; wondering to myself who exactly this person is that mom is telling me about, cos that’s definitely not me! For over 30 years, she had kept a secret of this magnitude to herself!
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Henceforth, the Ministers will naturally be inclined to splash cash at their bodyguards without stopping to count; and will regularly tell their protectors how they’ll always love them. Also, like their masters’ little brats, the bodyguards’ kids can now finally relish a sausage fest at every breakfast and enjoy freshly-baked bread with Nutella spread on one side and orange marmalade on the other.
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As you progress above 100kph, the steering wheel starts to feel weightless. You then get this sense that anytime now, you’re approaching that point where a slight distraction could cause you to get airborne. Even so, still you’ll find an extremely brave motorist flying past you at 130kph, and they’re driving a one-ton Toyota-IST.
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